and maybe, foul is fair...

Room

When I finish clearing my room for you, we will buy many drinks and many flu medicine and die.  

Trapped

I refuse to walk into the church. I am afraid of the words, the words that wrap around my naked skin like a steel chain, so cold and rough. It was too harsh, everything about that place.

Once upon a time, I gave all of me to God. Then everything crashed.

He left, she was like a dead soul loitering in this cruel world. I wanted to protect her… so much. I killed my emotions for her, I faced this evil world, I wanted to carry her cross but it didn’t helped. The moment she said,” I am so sad now, because no one understand how I feel, I am lonely.” All she ever wanted was you

I wanted very much to tell her, ” So was I, “  but I didn’t. I sat on the chair you used to sit. I carried up everything you refused to, all the things you dumped and left- me, her and everything we had. I was a kid I didn’t want the chair, I didn’t need it. All I ever wanted was a family like other, but what was the point of admiring, I keep admiring and that is all I do. I keep pleasing people but no matter who I please, they are unable to please me. I was so sad. All I want to do was to walk backwards, fix it all.

I miss the time I giggle when you kissed her on her neck and french her. It was love wasn’t it? Please tell me it was love. Tell me I was made of love and not a mistake you both regretted so much.

Maybe I ruined your life but you ruined mine. More than you think you did. I was a simple girl.

Knock Knock

Hey anyone there? I am in a mess again.

Buried Dance

When I was fresh and naive, 

 a beautiful woman asked me for a dance. 

I took her hand. She move her body like the swaying leaves and

she sing her words like the dancing birds, so

free, it makes a young girl go

wild.I have not asked for this dance, 

but her music found it’s way to my heart

I have not asked for the words, 

but the woman fed me her sweet nothings. 

Now I am going crazy, because the woman let go of my hand and ran.  

I did not want another gruelling wait, so I chased. 

My exsistence never go beyond the four brick walls of my home.

I was frightened to go out but I chased after her anyway. 

I needed her company badly, I needed her eros in me. 

I needed her to dance with me again. 

I am terrified at the thought of filling up her empty space within me. 

I don’t want to be alone in the cold breeze. 

So I kept chasing her in the woods, trees after trees. 

I tried to reach out to her with my one last breathe, but

I tripped and she continued running anyway. 

I watch her shadow growing hazier and hazier in the woods. 

She is gone now.

I do not know my way home. I lie flat and thought,

So this is what it’s like to be lost in the woods, the woods… 

so lovely, dark and deep.

I buried our last dance in the woods, the woods…

so lovely, dark and deep.